10 Women Christian Men Should Never Marry

10 Women Christian Men Should Avoid Like The Plague Never Marry

Recently, my attention was guided to a blog post – versions of which I’m sure have been done to death. “10 Men Christian Women Should Never Marry” – a blog post on Charisma Mag riddled with jaw dropping gems like this one

I have always believed God is in the matchmaking business

The problem I have with the post is that the 10 stereotypes mentioned, aren’t supposed to be gender specific yet positioned in a way so as to make it appear so. The only purpose lists like that serve, is pandering.

Unless you’ve managed to “put a ring on it” by a certain timeframe, you probably know just how difficult it is to find someone who you connect with, let alone marry. So while we love to wallow at the lack of decent members from the opposite sex, here is a list of 10 “wrong women” that christian men should avoid at all costs.

1.  The Unbeliever – 2 Corinthians 6 :14 advises against being yoked with unbelievers. So doesn’t matter if she’s drop dead gorgeous or has that amazing rack or even those sexy curves. If she doesn’t believe, she’s not the one for you.
2. The Liar – If you discover she’s lied about her past or that she’s always making up excuses to cover her tracks, exit now! Marriage must be build on the foundation of trust. If she can’t be truthful, break up before she bamboozles you with an even bigger deception (oh maybe something along the lines of “we’re pregnant and it’s yours”)
3. The Slut – Just because she goes to church doesn’t mean she lives a pure life. We’ve all heard stories of girls in the worship team behaving like heathens during the other days of the week – heck most of us have seen it with our own eyes. If she has been sleeping around before you got together, odds are the behavior will continue. And if she hasn’t, then who is to say she won’t start after you get together. Damned if you do, damned if you don’t. So tread with care.
4. The Addict – Whether its drugs or alcohol, churchgoing women have perfected the art of covering up their tracks. Trust your instincts on this one. If she’s denying it, tell her straight up “Addicts always deny they have a problem”. If she doesn’t want help, forget about her. You can’t fix her!
5. The Gold Digger – Times are tough but money is the root of all evil. There are so many women out there who just want access to 50% of your net worth. One of the many ways to test for this hypothesis is to say “I’m considering giving away most of my wealth to charity. But we’ll still have enough to live fairly comfortably”.  Study her reaction. Video tape it if you have to. Do a thorough background check just to be on the safer side. Hire a PI if you have to. If there are any signs, and I mean any signs at all (no matter how small) you throw her ass out on the street.
6. The Princess – Disney and daddies have a good majority of girls of this generation growing up to think they are princesses. The worst of which you can see on that one TV show. Anyways, if she wants to be coddled like some princess she better have the lineage to back it up!
7. The Uber Feminist – Feminism has its roots in achieving equality for women ‘in relation to that enjoyed by men’. That’s fantastic. But if she’s going on and on about patriarchy, glass ceilings and unequal pay scales – that’s a red flag. Now don’t get me wrong. It’s not a red flag that she mentions these things, but often as is the case with feminists, there won’t be any “dialogue”. Don’t waste your time. Move on, preferable AFTER you’ve put her things out on the street.
8. The Blackmailer – You’ve ever had to deal with girls who hang things over your head indefinitely? “Oh exactly 72 days ago you forgot to hold the door open for me”. The only logical response to this is “Are you f**king serious?”. If she keeps bringing stuff from the past back up, do yourself a favor and run!
9. The One with the Sugar Daddy – Enough said. If you’re going to be someone’s sugar daddy make sure you are tied with any long-term strings.
10. The Control Freak – If she wants to know where you are at every moment. You know  the kind that if you go “radio silent” for more than 20 min, throws a hissy fit. Stop enabling her and throw her ass out.

There are many more types of “wrong woman” that you should stay away from if you’re a christian man. I can think of at least 5 more stereotypes, but since this is supposed to be a piece of writing that balances out that other one I mentioned in the beginning, I’m going to exercise restraint. I’ll end with a paragraph similar to the one from the original post.

If you are a man of God, don’t sell your spiritual birthright by marrying a woman who doesn’t deserve you. Your smartest decision in life is to wait for a woman who is sold out to Jesus

Vomit!

Google Glass – Life’s Russian Dashcam

I just love those Russian Dashcam compilations on YouTube. And more importantly, seems like every driver in Russia has one too! Makes for a never ending supply of these videos.

Every other day there seems to be a new story about some hapless dude being a victim of a false rape accusation. It just sucks to be in that position because it’s her word against his. It is scenarios like this where a video footage would come super handy.

With wearable computing all the rage in 2013, prices likely to become more affordable down the line, storage prices following the same trend, it’s just a matter of time before most of us have a Google Glass type device always switched on and recording. I, for one, don’t think it’s such a bad idea. Screw privacy. I’d rather be protected from some inebriated person filing a false claim that about privacy. So come on Google Glass and competitors, let’s make those devices affordable.

The Proper Time and Place for Men’s Rights

How does one approach the issue of men’s rights in a country like India, for example, where every week there seems to be a story about a man raping a woman. Or Pakistan, where girls are being targeted and attacked for pursuing an education. Look at places like Bangladesh and China where sweatshop workers mostly women*, bear the brunt of greedy and often inhumane working conditions. India has a ridiculous female infanticide rate. Women are automatically relegated to certain roles and limited to them by virtue of their gender. Dowry related killings often end up with the woman being harassed even killed. I’ve heard more stories about women being victims of domestic violence than men. How then, as a man in one of these region, can you begin a conversation on men’s rights.

Lets move to the western hemisphere and look at most of the developed nations. Things are a complete opposite it would seem. Waves of feminism has resulted in laws that are skewed against men by default. Child custody cases are almost always judged in favor of the mother. I suspect that’s because of the “mother knows best” attitude that is almost always unchallenged. Do men have any parental rights in these countries anymore (check the options available for a woman at pregnancy vs. those available for a man). If the disparity in the options doesn’t bother you, you’re missing the point. Domestic violence automatically considers the woman as the victim (what about the men? The automatic response from the radicals is “Yeah, what about them?” Sigh). When it comes to assault charges a woman’s word is the only needed evidence. So much for due process. Been falsely accused? “There there.” (pat on the shoulder). Let’s not even go into education, now a place where you can’t even have a discourse without radical feminists disrupting the peace.  What about men’s shelters vs. women shelters.

Seems to me, that the east could use with a dose of feminism. But perhaps this time we can have it limited to where females receive equal rights and consideration without undercutting men. Seems like the west can make do with a dose of men’s rights. And no, no one wants to do that by taking away any rights that women have fought over the years for OR stopping them from being considered equally in the future. The biggest problem in both cases is getting all parties to exercise some restraint without going overboard. As humans, it seems we have lost the ability to be balanced in our approach to any situation. The thoughtlessly executed “knee-jerk”, throw punches without looking, shoot first ask questions later approach always results in unintended consequences for everyone involved.

All of this brings me back to the original question. Is there a proper time and place for men’s rights? If humans had the decency to consider everyone’s rights equally we wouldn’t even have to ask this question in the first place, would we?

*Feminist.org contends that 80-95% of sweatshop workers are  young women between the ages of 15-25. While I don’t call “bullshit” on this outright, I would like to see the data on this and arrive at my own conclusion. Thank you.

Cross Border Political Criticism

As the world progresses, so does the resistance from political powers against criticism. India is a perfect example. World’s largest democracy but the moment you, as a citizen, say something against a member of a political party or a political party itself that’s a quick ticket to jail. Russia is another example where clamp downs seem to be in full force. China and North Korea often come to mind for its open stance on freedom. So what if you find something the government is doing to be unconscionable and you feel like voicing your opinion?

Maybe the answer lies in outsourcing. For example if Country B’s citizens were to air criticisms on Country A’s government and vice versa, it’s not like the government can put you in prison for talking about another country right? The criticisms are aired and no one goes to jail. Right? Right?

Sigh. Why is it that all of a sudden people can’t take criticisms?  Discourse, heated or not, has been the cornerstone of humanity’s progress since The Enlightenment maybe even before. And curtailing it just because you don’t like what’s being said is a very dangerous precedent. We might soon find ourselves not being able to say what we feel like for fear of being oppressed. Oh wait., that’s already happening in many parts of the world. Even in the ones where we didn’t quite think it would happen.

Rape Liars – Where is the Outrage

Is it me or has there been a tad bit more spotlight on false rape cases. The latest one on the radar was the one with Linsey Attridge. Here’s the background as taken from the article I want to discuss. This well written article was in the Daily Mail of all places

The 31 year-old from Aberdeen, Scotland, falsely accused two strangers of sexual assault in  a twisted bid to trap her boyfriend into their ailing relationship.

The single mother-of-one claimed that two men broke into her home and committed the violent attack while her partner was away playing football.

She then punched herself in the face and ripped her clothes to make the story appear more credible, before spending three days trawling social networking site Facebook to find innocent users she could ‘identify’ as responsible

Did you read that last paragraph? Just like that scene from “Fight Club”. Anyways the authorities did their due diligence and found out that she was lying. All go to court and what does she get?

200 hours of unpaid community service

Does that seem fair to you? There are people in prison some even serving long sentences after being falsely accused. DNA exonerations, when in the news, don’t even cause us to bat an eyelid these days. While I don’t have any statistics, I’m sure a majority of the falsely accused, time-serving folks are men. Which brings us to the real question

Why in God’s name isn’t there any outrage against those that lie and falsely accuse?

There is plenty of outrage even protests against rape. And while it has often taken a “men shouldn’t rape women” angle it is supposed to be “rape shouldn’t happen to anyone PERIOD” (Yep that’s right. Rape is not gender biased). False rape accusations are just as serious. Lives are ruined, reputations tarnished with no chance of repair. So yes this is very very serious. And if there isn’t just as much outrage against false rape accusers, as there is against rapists then it isn’t right.

As Peter Lloyd puts it ever so brilliantly

Gender pay gap? Let’s sort the gender sentencing gap too.

Damn straight!

Poverty : Data is for losers

I came across a post titled “Pay Gap Deniers”  (cached version here) which tried to explain that the “gender wage gap” is not a result of choice of free will but rather forced (at least that’s what I thought it wanted to say).

At the 3rd paragraph, the author Joan C. Williams, writes

Forget the wage gap for a minute. What is the face of poverty in the United States? A mother and her child.

At this point, I decided to stop reading and go find some numbers. The Census.gov website has some statistics from the 2011 census that breaks down poverty by sex. According to their numbers, in 2011, 13.6% of males and 16.3% of females were classified poor. Yes, according to the data, there are more poor females than males. But does that make a mother and child the “Face of poverty in the United States”? Umm, don’t think so. And it takes someone with absolutely no heart to look at that and go “Yeah, look at the numbers. There is inequality there. We have to work on that”. No, you’re missing the point. What we should work towards, is 0% poverty across genders.

Men Have Football Women Have Hate

I preface this post with “not all men have an exuberant passion for football and likewise not all women are filled with hate (I hope). Also while the world calls it football Americans love to call it soccer. Therefore the sport in question is American Football. Let’s get this moving, shall we?

I found this little gem on one of the social networks I am subscribed to

“Men who have a thirty-six-televised-football-games-a- week-habit should be declared legally dead and their estates probated.” – Erma Bombeck

Some of you might be curious to find out who this person is and for you, read more about Erma Bombeck here. This same lady had another quote

“If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead.” – Erma Bombeck

A football game runs about 3 hours on the tele and this means that in scenario #1 a man would have to spend 108 hours a week (this works out to about 15.42 hours a day!) on watching football. In scenario #2, he would spend 9 hours in a row.

Work done by Adweek/Harris Poll shows 64% of American watch NFL

almost two-thirds of U.S. adults say they currently watch NFL football (64%), including almost three-quarters of men (73%) and over half of women (55%).

Also, from Statistia,

As you can see the majority of folks polled watch only about 5 hours of less per week. The highest allocation of hours is 16 hours per week or more.

This is NOT EVEN CLOSE TO the 15.42 hours A DAY that Erma Bombeck and her legion swear by!

Then there is the question of 3 games at a stretch (9 hours). While I have no hard stats on this, a quick look at the NFL playoff schedule for 2012 (post season) shows one game a day. I will concede that there might be at most 2 games a day. But to state 3 games a day? Come on ladies, let’s be fair now.

Now maybe the reason why women hate this is because they don’t have a “female only” mainstream sport they can get behind. Maybe just as the other camp suspect, they just can’t seem to understand why and how men can have fun without involving them. I have no idea. Whatever the case, you don’t see men complaining that women spend their productive time watching episodes of “Desperate Housewives”, “Real Housewives of [Insert Location], “Teen Moms” and other worthless junk. Which leads me to New Rule

NEWRULE: Ladies, if you want to get all worked up about guys watching football you’ll need to accept that men can get all worked up about you watching reality TV shows like “Desperate Housewives”, “Dr. Phil”, yes and even Oprah! You see, one is about a set of people getting dressed up to systematically take down others, also often in a cohesive fashion, using sanity-pondering tactics. It’s also about questioning some of the most ridiculous decisions one, as a human, could make…And then there’s football.

In other words, “Ladies, leave us the fuck alone”!

Feminism vs. MRM vs. Egalitarianism

Gender Rights Over The Years

This chart is not meant to be historically accurate or scientific. Rather it’s meant to illustrate the different social movements (feminism and MRM. And yes its missing LGBT activism) that have been gaining momentum and “vocal share” over the past century and more. We start by benchmarking the rights that men had in the early 90s as the egalitarian standard.

Feminism

If you look at the chart above, you’ll notice that even in the early 1900s women’s rights were disproportionate to those enjoyed by males. For example The Nineteenth Amendment, which guarantees equal voting rights regardless of sex, was ratified only on Aug 18, 1920.

For a view on why women weren’t offered suffrage before, see this video by GirlWritesWhat

Here is what she had to say

From the website “great war fiction”, regarding Britain’s white feather campaign…‘In other words, the white feather girls and the suffragettes understood that men had political franchise and women did not because men had a duty to go to war, and protect women.’”

Feminism started as a movement to secure equal rights for women.

Radical Feminism

With time, however, fringe factions that advocated misandry (both subtly and in plain sight) hijacked the feminism conversation. It ceased to be about securing equal rights for women but rather about male hatred masked by half chewed ideas masquerading under pseudo-scientific terms like “patriarchy”, “rape culture” and my personal favorite “male privilege”. The movement became all about “paying back” the men for years of “repression”.

Traditionalism

Over the course of time, some started to see through the pseudo-intellectual smog that radical feminists started to push. The result was members of both sexes advocating for a return to the times of old, wrapped under the premise that we all have different roles to play. The only problem with traditionalism, however, is that this boat has long since sailed and unless some unprecedented humanitarian disaster occurs that forces a radical altering of our social course, this is nothing more than a pipe dream.

 Male Rights Movement (MRM)

From the emasculation of men in media for decades (even more acutely after the 2000s), the heavily skewed family court laws, domestic violence laws, rape culture propaganda, educational and economic setbacks due to a combination of various factors and in no small part due to protectionist ideologies, males have found themselves holding the shorter end of the stick. This gave rise to the movement advocating for equal rights of men – The Male Rights Movement or The Male Rights Activism.

Some would like to believe that the purpose of the MRM is similar to that of traditionalists hell-bent on bringing the world back to the 1950s. The truth couldn’t be further.

Egalitarianism

However Utopian this might sound to some, securing equal rights for all groups is the purpose of the egalitarian movement. Unlike specific movements designed to secure rights for the groups they are designed for (which in essence is also its biggest flaw), egalitarianism is an all-inclusive movement.

Egalitarianism vs. Feminism vs. MRM

Why is the egalitarianism circle slightly larger with more intersection area? Egalitarianism, for example, doesn’t hold the view that parenting decisions should be the sole right of one of the sexes. It transcends the feminist and MRM movements to include other marginalized sections of the society including the LGBT community, the transgender community and other communities that may arise in the generations to follow.

Conclusion

Members of both feminism and MRM contend that the while the ultimate destination could be an egalitarian society, its time to focus solely on the needs of their groups. To highlight the danger of this narrow view, I would like to put forth something I heard recently while watching the movie Lincoln

A compass will point you true north. But it won’t show you the swamps between you and there. If you don’t avoid the swamps, what’s the use of knowing true north?

Most activists in either camp recognize that the ultimate direction (true north) will take them to an egalitarian state. But in the interest of winning those “low hanging fruit”, they chose to overlook that advancing their own causes, through the reasoning of priority, takes them directly into the swamps and ravines.

God gets 10% and you get fired

Did you read about the St. Louis pastor Alois Bell who followed WWJD (What Would Jesus Do) to the letter by stiffing Applebee’s waiter his/her tips? When a picture of her eloquently stated reason

I give God 10%. Why do you get 18?

ended up on Reddit, albeit with identifiable information, and went viral, she later had an epiphany and decided it was an act that “brought embarrassment to her church and ministry”

And while she had this apparent change of heart, she also had the “presence of mind” and “forgiving nature” to place a call to the restaurant location and call for the immediate firing of all staff. Yep, that’s right! All staff! As a result of her selfless actions, the waitress Chelsea who took the picture and posted it online got fired. Oh by the way, Pastor Alois Bell is a mother of three. Great example for the kids!

Dear Alois Bell, thanks for giving Christians all over the world a bad name.

While the Internet sleuths and regular Joes/Janes are raging about the unfairness of the whole ordeal, most of America and the rest of the world are saying

“In the midst of all this you had the time to make a call to get everyone fired?”

Ain’t Nobody Got Time Fo Dat!

India’s New Time Pass Is Rape

Recently the nation of India was in the news for all the wrong reasons. Apparently men in India are fond of raping women. In India, a rape occurs every 18-20 minutes. I recently read that Delhi, the nation’s capital, was affectionately called “Rape Capital” by the media. In the last 2 weeks of December 2012 many folks took to the streets to protest a brutal incident where a student was gang raped by 6 freaks on a bus. Tragically, the girl succumbed to her injuries.

You see, this isn’t the first brutal rape to happen in India and without change it won’t be the last. Even while protests were going on, there were multiple incidents reported in various other parts of India. The response to the whole incident and what is undoubtedly a social, cultural and national epidemic was unsurprising and comical at best.

First, the government decided it was going to honor the status quo and took a vow of silence. When anger grew even further some ministers decided they would switch tactics and started the blame game. Some even said the government had to be sensitive/neutral and therefore abstain from addressing the protests. As negative feedback grew all fingers suddenly pointed towards the state police. As if all of this wasn’t comical enough, the media focus frenzy was where the true gold could be found.

If you have ever tried watching a news segment on Indian TV you’ll notice that you can’t hear a goddamn thing as everyone is intent on yelling and more importantly talking all at once. Coz God forbid someone can actually hear what you have to say! “Pundits” and “gurus” came out of the woodwork to offer their take on the “issue” and a plethora of rhetoric followed. All that could be heard was “We have to ask the hard questions”, “Time for introspection” etc. Seriously? People wanted to see change and in true form, the suggested action was “thinking of what action needed to be taken” (half a decade after everyone knew this was a problem)

Here are the some of the fascinating suggestions on short/long-term actions  (as stated by the nation’s citizen on national TV)

1. Stay indoors
2. Ban skirts
3. Stricter laws (as India’s reputation on upholding laws are stellar)
4. Ban porn sites in India (this was the funniest one. A “liberal arts” student was on national TV advocating this. I’m sure she had tons of data to support her theory about its effectiveness. I am also quite certain she knew all about how proxy servers and VPN worked)
5. Hiring more women police (as India’s history on workplace harassment is just amazing)
6. Further segregation between boys/girls and men/women (as it has proven effective for the past 60 years!)

If THIS is the kind of mind-blowing, forward thinking ideas that the nation could come up with, it’s no wonder we are still stuck in this unfortunate rut. I think what is even more sad is that the true intellectuals were drowned out, or they just plainly refused to say what they had it mind coz why bother?

If there is one thing Indians love, it’s status quo and rest assured this won’t be the last we hear of India’s rape epidemic.